Seldom early, never late
I find myself in a season of waiting on God. I don't like it very much. I think I have a grasp of what His will is, but the wheels just seem to be turning way too slowly. Actually, if I’m honest, it sometimes feels like we’ve pulled off the road and misplaced the keys.
How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me? –Psalm 13:1-2 (ESV)
There was a time when I was so certain of what the outcome needed to be that I ran ahead of the light. The situation was broken and I was convinced God needed my help to fix it. In my pride, I believed I could control things. The results were not pretty. Relationships were damaged.
After realizing and repenting of my arrogance, the weight of the situation drove me to despair and depression. There was a shadow over my whole existence. Nothing mattered. My life and my ministry were all for naught and I really felt the world would be a happier place if I was not in it.
Consider and answer me, O Lord my God; light up my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death, lest my enemy say, “I have prevailed over him,” lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken. –Psalm 13:3-4 (ESV)
God has a long history of rescuing His people, redeeming hopeless situations, and reclaiming what the enemy has stolen. I’ve experienced it myself. So in spite of moments of sadness and frustration, I continue to hold out hope. There is a result I pray for, but it isn’t mine to achieve.
It’s been said that God is seldom early, but He’s never late. I know He is sovereign. I know He is good. I’m learning to depend on Him. I believe He is working behind the scenes in ways I cannot see to perform mighty works I can’t even imagine. And I believe faith is forged in the fire of the waiting.
But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me. –Psalm 13:5-6 (ESV)